CHRISTMAS is the time to celebrate family, loved ones and the truly important things in life.

But, all too often, we become distracted by other concerns; wanting to provide the perfect Christmas for our nearest and dearest, the demands of entertaining our guests or the desire to not miss out by saying yes to every invitation or request.

Let's look at some ways to lighten the load and make for an easier stressfree Christmas with these ABCs:

* Ability. Accept that you cannot physically do everything yourself, and indeed don't need to. Ask for help and let others share. Your children may enjoy making cards, crackers, wrapping presents, setting the Christmas table, enjoy planning some of the entertainment. Your mother-in-law may positively glow at being asked to make the Christmas cake or her famous signature dish. Allow others to participate and have their own areas of responsibility.

* Buying. For many families the fear of being overwhelmed by debt is never far away; some report that it takes up to three years to repay the expense of a single Christmas. A change in interest rates, personal circumstances, like divorce, loss of overtime or bonus payments, can literally throw a tightly managed budget into tragedy, causing serious financial stress and money worries.

But a survey by Ikea discovered that when children were asked to write two letters, one to Father Christmas with their gift wish list and the other to their parents saying what they wanted from them, when told they could only send one of their letters every child elected to send the one to their parents. Memorable experiences and time together often mean more than expensive gifts.

* Catering and lavish spreads are often the focal point of a great Christmas but people often tire of rich indulgent dinners and welcome the sight of a delicious homemade soup with crusty bread or a stew or casserole with the trimmings, especially after a brisk country walk or energetic game of football. Oftentimes these dishes can be prepared in advance and cooked as required, so easing some Christmas cooking stress.

Focus on what's really important and enjoy your Christmas time.