THE grand old houses have always fascinated me, even though their mere existence goes against my principles.

One such property provides the backdrop for Alan Bennett’s brilliant new play, People.

To put it mildly, the place has seen better days and it’s so cold the lady of the house, the aristocratic Dorothy Stackpoole, lives in a full length fur coat.

She shares the house with the dotty Iris, her companion, and together they make a pair of very engaging, quintessentially English eccentrics.

Dorothy has to come up with a strategy to save her family home falling around about their ears and interested parties range from the National Trust to a maker of adult movies.

You feel a certain amount of sympathy for Dorothy when the body finally takes over her family’s home and even she becomes a museum piece.

But Dorothy, played to perfection by Sian Phillips, has a final trick up her sleeve to play on the visitors who make her feel she’s suddenly living in a goldfish bowl. As Iris, Brigit Forsyth is a delight and I can’t wait until I reach an age, like Iris has, where she doesn’t care two hoots what people think of her. Together, they are a priceless pair.

Yet another intelligent and insightful comedy from this country’s greatest living playwright. I wish I couldn’t borrow Alan Bennett’s brilliant brain. Just for a day.

* Until October 19. The box office is on 0843 208 6000. Star rating - *****