I USED to love birthdays.

As a kid, there's no better day of the year.

Even Christmas doesn't compare and that says a lot coming from someone who enjoys his food more than Johnny Vegas after a week in the desert.

You see, at Christmas you had to put up with your family.

I'm not talking about my immediate family here, I don't mind spending time with my parents, younger brother or even my grandparents.

It's those aunties and uncles you spend all year doing your best to avoid, only to be told you have to make searingly painful smalltalk with them at some family gathering rather than playing with your brand new Optimus Prime.

No, I'm not a sadist and no, I don't want to look at photos of my uncle's beloved narrow boat, I want to save our planet by leading the Autobots to a glorious victory over those evil Decepticons.

On your birthday, however, there was nothing to detract from the fun. As the song goes, it's my party and I'll cry if I want to.

You decide who you speak to and who you don't on your birthday and the best thing about it, it was never seen as rudeness because it was your 'special day'.

Cheers for the gift vouchers but if you don't mind, could you pick up your party bag at the door and shuffle off home. I never was a very sociable child.

Nowadays, everything's changed. Birthday's don't hold anywhere near the same level of significance - I suppose when you've had 25 of them the novelty starts to wear off a bit.

I don't get the same amount of presents I used to, nobody buys me a big chocolate cake with my name spelt out in icing on the top and in their place, there's the endless chirping chorus of 'what are you doing for your birthday?'

Why do I have to do something special on my birthday? After all it's only another day.

Why do I have to make an effort to get all dressed up and go out when i can quite as easily crack open a couple of tinnys at home?

I'm not one of these people who fears my impending old age but I really can't be bothered with all the fuss.

All that groundwork I put in avoiding the annoying masses in my formative years seem to have gone to waste because it's these people who crawl out of the woodwork every birthday.

"Errr, alright mate, I know I've not spoken to you for three months but happy birthday like."

Why is it that this society seems determined to force me into being some kind of social animal? Keep your facebook and your Myspace, it's quality not quantity of friends that matters to me.